Give 'em the old razzle dazzle~Razzle Dazzle 'em!

I spoke to filly several days ago. His situation seemed to be deteriorating. Everything he said to me seemed to reek of desperation. They had cut off the water to his building. His doctors wanted him to have surgery ASAP on his knee and ankle. He was still deeply depressed by the way I had treated him. AND on it went. A friend I had shared this ongoing saga with found the new chapter to be ludicrous. Actually laughing out loud at the alleged suicide attempt. I thought she was being a little cold around the heart. WHEN WILL I LEARN MY FRIENDS ARE ALL SMARTER THEN ME!!!

Well, today on my way home from the plantation I decided to ring his phone and see if he would answer. He did not. A women did. Here is the conversation:

She: Hel-low
Me: Hello, May I please speak to Filly?
She: He's not available right now. Who's Calling?
Me: This is Eda. Do you know when he will be available?
She: What is this in reference too?
Me: I haven't spoken to him in a few days and I was concerned. Is this his girlfriend?
She: ....hesitation "yes"
Me: Then you can probably answer my question. Is he alright? Is everything OK?
She: laughs...Yes, he's fine. everything is ok
Me: Oh good! well tell him I called and that I'm glad everything worked out well for him
She: OK I Will
Me: Alright gurl...have a good night!
She: You Too!

Did this Ninja think he would knock me off my square with this? Fa Reel? All that nonsense and for what. AND I don't even believe she's his girl! My spidey senses told me from the beginning not to trust this situation. My girls co-signed it. Yet...I stepped over all of that and went straight ahead down that dark ally! Yikes! Sorry Chica's (sad face) Next Time I Won't Be So Head Strong!
LMAO! Love U Girls!

I've been neglectful...

It's been almost 3 months since I lasted posted! Where did the time go!

For starters I have had an almost 2 month relationship....ova da phone!!! LMAO There were highs... There were lows... It was pure theater! Lets call him "Fillie" don't ask. Anywho, I met him in chat....don't judge me either! He looked good and he sounds like Tone Loc all rough and sexxy......sorry, my mind started to wander.  There were some "issues" but aren't there always. He said the sweetest things to me and I think it's true women do fall in love through the ears. He felt like a well worn cotton sweater, fresh out of the dryer on a rainy day. I wanted to wrap him around me and be warmed. We talked about everything and I looked forward to his company.

He lives to far for a spur of the moment date but closest enough to meet up on a Saturday. I wanted to meet to someplace neutral (read safe). He wanted to hook-up for a weekend. We made plans and I backed out...twice. The third time proved to be the undoing. We were suppose to meet this coming weekend. He wanted me to take a few days off and meet him in Atlantic City. I declined. He then wanted to come here for the weekend. At first I agreed but then after much prompting from my "friends" I told him he would have to stay in a hotel. He declined. This is what you would call a Mexican standoff. I acquiesced for 48 hours.

Last night we had it out...le sigh. After brow-beating me for over an hour I couldn't take it anymore. My inner good girl went bad and I got the giggles. I told him him he couldn't stay with me and that he was wearing me out with his conversation! Fillie became enraged! Lions & Tigers & Bears! Oh My! It ended with him continuing to over talk me while I told him maybe this entire affair had been a bad idea...just before I hung up. Oh well, on to the next one! Deuces!

And So It Goes...

I have a group of friends affectionately known as The Fantanas. One said to me recently that dating is a numbers game. "Look at it this way...these are all practice dates so when Mr. Right comes along you'll be able to tell and be a pro at the first date"

  The past couple of days I've received several texts from D.  I had not heard from him in over a week and said so. He seemed to be under the misconception that he had been in contact with me...O Rly? That conversation ended in a stalemate. The next day he sent me a duplicate text which actually said "duplicate".  Dude....Really? I just couldn't respond. Today I get a text informing me of text to be sent later informing me if he "feels" up to getting together. Again, Dude... Really? I mean... Really? I don't hear from him again until 1:30am  What is that? I know it's not me.

I am clear this is strange behavior. No matter what may be going on in someone's life this is bull. I keep thinking back to what I've been told many times "everything is practice for the real thing".  I have heard it repeated in many different forms over and over again from many different people. I have been blessed with meeting many different men over the past several months. I'm just going to enjoy the ride for now...whatever happens...happens.

Fiending For That Creamy Crack

I have decided to go natural. As an African American women this is a major decision. This is no small part due to Chris Rock's documentary Good Hair. I have gone natural in the past but I shaved all my hair off. This time I'm growing it out. Feeling my roots is difficult. I keep expecting the hair police to hand me a summons. I do intend to keep coloring my hair, maybe even a little lighter. Saying goodbye to the creamy crack (relaxer). will be difficult. However, it's just one of the many changes I'm making in my life. ....just breath.....

Sisterhood

January may be the beginning of a new year but there is something about September. The ending of summer and the promise of re-invigoration ahead. While my school days are far behind me I still think of September as a fresh start (minus paste & rubber glue). With that in mind I've started my search for funding, a job, some sort of income to keep me a float.

I received a letter that said as part of the stimulus package there was money available for schools and training. Looking to take advantage I went to social services today. There were two other women ahead of me. One was reserved, well put together, reading a magazine. The other.... well that was a different story. She appeared to have just been released from somewhere. She began talking to no one in particular about her children, their different fathers and how she was trying to get her life together. I was deeply engrossed in organizing the contents of my handbag.

The receptionist informed her she needed an appointment and would have to return. Well outrage does not begin to describe her reaction! I silently prayed I would not be hit with a flying object...not having health insurance and all. She left, only to return minutes later. She then began to spill all the sordid details of her life to the other women and myself. Why? I don't know. Clearly I was involved in the fine art of coin arrangement and the other women was engrossed in an article about orthotics.

She believed she was being treated unfairly. We as women have to stick together. We can't let the system take advantage of us. Of us? This chick would not have given me the time of day in an ordinary social setting. Unless it was to make fun of my shoes and\or handbag! Now that she's having a problem were all in it together. Yeah...Right I truly wish people would miss me with their pretense.

(I have to return for a follow-up appointment on the 8th...fingers crossed!)