I've been neglectful...

It's been almost 3 months since I lasted posted! Where did the time go!

For starters I have had an almost 2 month relationship....ova da phone!!! LMAO There were highs... There were lows... It was pure theater! Lets call him "Fillie" don't ask. Anywho, I met him in chat....don't judge me either! He looked good and he sounds like Tone Loc all rough and sexxy......sorry, my mind started to wander.  There were some "issues" but aren't there always. He said the sweetest things to me and I think it's true women do fall in love through the ears. He felt like a well worn cotton sweater, fresh out of the dryer on a rainy day. I wanted to wrap him around me and be warmed. We talked about everything and I looked forward to his company.

He lives to far for a spur of the moment date but closest enough to meet up on a Saturday. I wanted to meet to someplace neutral (read safe). He wanted to hook-up for a weekend. We made plans and I backed out...twice. The third time proved to be the undoing. We were suppose to meet this coming weekend. He wanted me to take a few days off and meet him in Atlantic City. I declined. He then wanted to come here for the weekend. At first I agreed but then after much prompting from my "friends" I told him he would have to stay in a hotel. He declined. This is what you would call a Mexican standoff. I acquiesced for 48 hours.

Last night we had it out...le sigh. After brow-beating me for over an hour I couldn't take it anymore. My inner good girl went bad and I got the giggles. I told him him he couldn't stay with me and that he was wearing me out with his conversation! Fillie became enraged! Lions & Tigers & Bears! Oh My! It ended with him continuing to over talk me while I told him maybe this entire affair had been a bad idea...just before I hung up. Oh well, on to the next one! Deuces!

A Boy Story

What can I say. We met at a party. When I first saw him... I saw everything I liked. We talked and exchanged information. He asked me out to dinner a week in advance. I looked forward to this meeting with...an-tic-i-pa-tion. He choose the restaurant, TGIFridays. Not what my inner princess was use to but I could live with it. We were suppose to meet at 8pm. He arrived at 7:30pm. I arrived at 8:30pm. This was the first flag. Who arrives early? WTF? AND to TGIFridays? Spare me. Things deteriorated from there. He seemed to be annoyed through out the date and I really wanted to leave. Our Table sat four. Instead of sitting across from me he choose to sit catty-cornered. I stuck it out if only for the practice. (Deep breaths...Ou~Sau) When we left the restaurant we walked out at the same time but not really together. He asked what I'd be doing around 2am? "Sleeping why" I responded. He said he had to work that night but thought he could swing by my place on his break. Ninja please!


Well after discussing this with "The Girls" I pretty much wrote him off. Pretty much...but not totally. Over the next several weeks he called me daily. Made me laugh and in a way kept me company. We met for breakfast. This went much better then dinner. We continued to talk on the phone and to my surprise we've become friends. Saturday, after "HE" disappointed me. I decided to go out to a party. He was there. We laughed and talked and overall had a good time. I didn't feel put upon but I felt...safe. When I left he walked me to my car and later called to make sure I arrived home safely. I needed that. Later Wednesday night after my phone conversation with "HIM" this one called me. He told me how beautiful I was. He said I always looked good and never seemed to have an off day. He said when he saw me at the party it made...his nature rise ((lol)). I soooo needed someone to say something like that to me. But of course I recognize game as game.


One of "The Girls" said something to me that was spot on. If you've denied yourself something for a long time, like chocolate and then you have some it's sooooooo good. It seems like the best because you haven't had it for a long time. I haven't had any candy for a long time. So it makes sense it was so sweet to me. Maybe "HE" is the one...Maybe this one is the one... Maybe there is someone else I have yet to meet. There are many more flavors in the sweet-shop and I need to try a few more before I decided what to take home!

So Lovely To Meet You...

After several weeks I finally had a date with R. YEA!!! We agreed to meet at a lovely park half way between the two us. The day could not have been more perfect then if I designed it myself. He was driving a silver Cadillac Escalade ...Oh My! Now I think what you drive does make a statement and I was not sure that this was one I was interested in. No matter, I was going forward.

I wore a pretty but casual dove gray dress with a deep V neckline (had to make sure the girls looked good). I topped it off with yellow patient leather slides and a bucket bag of the same color and course D&G shades. I parked and he came over to great me. He was much better looking in person then in his photo. He was also heavier then his photo showed. We sat on bench and 'I" began to talk.

  Now, I sat with my body turned toward him. He sat with his body straight out in front, arms on the back of the bench and legs out in front of him. (not a good sign) I asked about his tattoos.... likes and dislikes.... movies.... books... even sports.... After about 20 minutes my efforts to keep up the conversation were becoming exhausting. I inquired about his plans for the rest of the day as I removed my keys from my handbag. Rising I told him it was very nice to meet him and started walking back toward the cars. I said "safe home". He said "talk to you soon". TALK ABOUT WHAT! Didn't we each just drive 30 minutes to sit in a park for 20 minutes with you barely talking? What else is there to say?


I felt somewhat dejected. I called a friend to rehash what had happened then I took myself to lunch. I sat outside a cafe with a glass of white sangria and let it go. I went into this knowing it would not happen immediately. I decided I would ask R. what he thought of me and our meeting. Here's the transcript:

 To R.
 It was nice to meet you yesterday. While there was no chemistry between us you do seem to be a very nice man. Your much more handsome in person then your pictures show. If possible I'd like to get some feedback. Any info would be appreciated!

Did I not look like my picture?
Dressed inappropriately?
Was I heavier then you anticipated?
Talk too much?
Not interesting?
Older then you thought?

Finding that someone is so difficult. It would help me to know what someone else thinks! Thanks in advance!

 To Me:

thank you for the compliment..you shouldn't be so critical of yourself and be happy who you are even if someone dont like you or not, asking all of these questions only opinions of one person and will vary from person to person..just be yourself

To R:

I think you misunderstood my inquiry. I don't suffer from low self-esteem nor do I justify  myself through someone else. I simply wanted feedback regarding our meeting. I believe we all have room for self-improvement and my skin is not so thin as to be bruised by an apathetic comment or response. Hell, even at a job you do an exit interview before you leave.

The questions I asked you were questions I've asked the other men I've dated. I think it's good to know how others perceive you. Sometimes you may be sending a message out to the world your not even aware of. I believe in being self-aware...but that's just me.

Best of luck to you Boo-Boo!

 

To Me:

ok..but you cant judge anybody on a first meeting, at least i don't

To R.:

I did not want you to judge me...nor did I judge you. I thought you were cool. You just did not seem interested when we met yesterday and that's fine.  I understand your a man of few words. I guess I should not have asked you... Anywho...I'm good. 

That was the last transmission before he went off into that good night...  Well dear friends there always tomorrow...(exits singing theme song to ANNE)

First Meeting...

I need a man...a boyfriend…an S/O! To that end I’ve joined the online dating community. After posting a photo and what I believed to be a very succinct description of who I am and what I’m looking for, I sat back and waited for eligible bachelor’s to flood into my e-mail. Well they flooded and they were eligible. However, I should have added desirable, verbal and forthright to the mix.

R. began flirting with me on said site. He’s tall, sexy, no kids but he is 14 years younger then me! (repeats to self…I am not a cougar). We e-mailed a few times and he asked for my telephone number, which of course I gave him. He didn’t call but we did continue to e-mail. About a week ago he invited me to lunch. We planned to meet yesterday and I was really looking forward to it. I had my hair and nails done and of course a cute outfit!

After checking my e-mail to see if something had change I headed out for the 30 minute drive to the meeting spot. I had selected a restaurant halfway between the two of us. First mistake was choosing a place I was not familiar with. The restaurant was closed for vacation the entire month of August! Some Nerve! I had gotten a parking space right in front and was congratulating myself until I noticed the large sign in the window. Reaching for my cell I realized I’d missed his call… DAMN. Allegedly he had just received a call informing him he had to start work early…allegedly.

There was no sense in wasting the parking space when I could idle at the curb for awhile and add to the carbon foot print. Sooo I began sending out texts to “the girls” (more about them later) regarding my, at least in my mind, horrific experience. Jeez Louise how did we date or do anything before cell-phones, blackberries, computers and debit cards? Well, the texts flew back and forth with the final consensus being…give the guy a second chance. I did call him back (9 hours later). I left a voice mail. He had suggested breakfast on Wednesday. I suggested we have a few phone conversations before making any additional plans.

I did call a second time today and he answered….surprise…surprise…surprise. We spoke for about 10 minutes. During which I asked about his interests ( movies, bowling, sports). He did not ask about mine. I asked about his experiences with online dating…to which he responded. “You have some crazy people and some good people and I’ve met both. Some want to play games, some are gold diggers and some are just plain crazy…you don’t know what your going to get until you actually meet them”. Again, he did not ask about my experiences. I wrapped up the call with “I hope to hear from you soon”. Now, I asked him about his experiences to gauge how girls he's dealing with. To my ear it sounds like it’s been quite a few. Obviously I was not on his “A” list and probably not his “B” list. He never actually called after asking for my number and it took several weeks to plan this meeting. I’m thinking I’m either on the “C” or (heaven forbid) THE D LIST (cue dramatic background music). Yes it does suck to think I might be so far down on the list. BUT I’m guessing his first choices, while shiny, were not gold. While the cream will always rise to the top…it does have to stand for awhile before it separates! Stay Tuned… MUAH!!!!